Maddy and Jordan are supposed to end up together. She broke up with her ex for him and everything. But she refuses to date him because she doesn’t wanna seem like she jumped into another relationship to other people (which is fucking dumb because who cares what other people think?) Jordan and I have become like super fucking close tho and we talk about everything and I kind of always have his back and we’re like really close friends now and it’s awesome but I’m terrified that he’s gonna start liking me bc he texts me right when he wakes up and calls me to make sure I’m ok and always does shit for me when I need him too and I really hope he’s just a really good fucking friend.
The only negative to staying with my friend in the hospital is that I’m staying with her mom and her mom knows about my eating shit and she keeps making me eat for no reason when I’m not hungry at ALL
I asked my friend to pay me back because yesterday she decided to be a retard and show up with no gas expecting to drive 2 and a half hours to the hospital and so I borrowed her 40 bucks and I wanna buy my friend in the hospital some stuff and she offered to pay me in weed? HOW AM I GONNA BUY ANYTHING WITH WEED UR A RETARD STAY AWAY FROM ME
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME SAMMY WHY WOULD YOU TRY TO LEAVE ME WHEN YOU’RE HALF OF THE REASON I WON’T KILL MYSELF. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHAT ARE YOU THINKING I NEED YOU I FUCKING NEED YOU YOU CANT JUST LEAVE ME AND SHANEN HERE ALONE YOU’VE BEEN THE REASON SO MANY TIMES WHY I DIDNT TAKE ANYMORE PILLS OR WHY I ATE WHAT ARE YOU DOING TRYING TO LEAVE ME HERE I FUCKING NEED YOU WHAT ARE YOU DOING? IF YOU CAN GIVE UP SO CAN I IM FUCKING DONE SAMMY I NEED YOU AND YOU TRIED TO LEAVE ME I CANT BREATHE ANYMORE
the only thing that could shatter my world anymore is if shanen wasn’t ok either.
You’ve been taking PILLS?! PILLS?! YOU”VE BEEN EXPERIMENTING WITH YOUR MEDS? WTF ARE YOU DOING SAMMY WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING I FUCKING NEED YOU HERE YOU CANT FUCK AROUND WITH SHIT. YOU DRANK AND TOOK PILLS???? WHAT ARE YOU DOING CAN YOU SERIOUSLY JUST BE SAFE? I NEED YOU TO BE SAFE BE SAFE. I NEED TO TALK TO YOU I NEED TO SEE YOUR FACE I NEED TO BE SURE YOU’RE OK
i need to kill myself as soon as i can
i need to be gone i’m worth nothing anymore